Regrets and Resolutions

Regrets-590x399 I read an article online a few days ago about a study that was done on regrets of the dying. Although this sounds like a depressing topic, as a novelist, I not only looked at it in relationship to my life but how the five regrets might affect a character in a novel and how it might cause conflicts and triumphs.


The Top Five Regrets of the Dying were:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
3. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
4. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
5. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

Now think about it. Do you have any of these regrets? What can you do now to make a difference in your life? If you had only a couple of years to live and knew it, how would you change your life? Can regrets affect your life in a radical way?  I like these questions because I they make me and others think. If I considered my own attitude toward the five regrets listed, I would probably be most guilty of the last one. When I became a novelist, I gave up many things in my life because of the time and focus writing takes. The main thing I gave up, besides housekeeping (That didn’t break my heart  as you can imagine), was my social life. Before I had friends I saw often. We got together for games, cards, dinner parties, and short fun trips. But those times are rarer now.

But regret struck another cord. It’s not a topic that I deal with in fiction, but as I thought about it, I realized my next novel released in April has a strong issue of regret. The regret affects the life of the female main character, and it has altered her enjoyment of life and her hope for a bright future.  It’s not easy to deal with regrets, especially the kind she had, because some regrets are things that we can’t undo . . .as it was in her case. But we can get over them. First by forgiving ourself, by allowing others to forgive us, by finding a positive result amid the negative and even by accepting the important life lesson we’ve learned. If the topic of regret interests you, I hope you will look for my April 2014 release, Rescued By The Firefighter, an LI that will probably hit the stores at the end of March. You can find t now on Amazon and preorder.

If you have no interest in the novel, think about the regrets above? Do those affect your life? If they do, how badly do the impact you? What are the most significant regrets that you have now? What can you do to make a difference in your life. Paula found a way  in Rescued By The Firefighter, but  how can you resolve those moments of wishing things were or had been different? We can all improve our lives if we can deal with and resolve our regrets. Think about it.

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